Well, let's see here.

Among the many things I am out of, necessary things such as diapers and toilet paper, patience is right at the top of the list.

September cannot come fast enough. School should be year round. And teenage boys should not have PMS. But its the 23rd of July, school isn't year round much to the disappointment of many parents, and oddly enough, teenage boys DO have PMS. Go figure.

Now that I'm a mom of 3 boys, I'm left wondering if I would have better off if they were girls.

I'm not bitching, I'm decluttering.

I am so very grateful that I have the work I do right now. Creatively, its keeping me going in between my own paintings. Financially, I'm not going to discuss it. Lets just say Fredward is very happy about my decision to return to work this fall. I am hoping that I am able to keep the creative juices flowing and eventually have enough NEW pieces to hold a show.

:big sigh:

I hope, with the utmost sincerity and skill, that I can complete all of my tasks at hand: 1- the logo for the newest Chapter of Wisconsin Campers Association- the East Troy Area Country Campers. It will be a damn shame and an epic failure if I can't figure it out. I'm getting there; Lorie, don't get stressed. I'm working on it... I've just had a major brain fart & its still a little cloudy in here. I want to make it perfect [because, you know I am ;) ] and easily made printed or embroidered. The making-it-easy-for-embroidery is a little more difficult, but never fear! I've come up with something! I just need to get it on paper, then into the computer. 2- The odd tasks/ creative spots at the Fox residence. I have a lot to do, and trying to do it with a baby whose just started cereal & baby food, is a whole new venture! Its like re-revolving yourself around the baby's schedule... again! Who knew? 3- The scenery for Camp Venture. I did 3/4 of my swamp scene today... & I'm pretty happy with it too! I've got a bit more to do, but I feel that I can get it done. 4- The very random, and very present, ideas that keep presenting themselves as FABULOUS artistic developments. I am extremely intrigued to get them all together, and I sincerely hope I can throw together an art show before the years' end. Which also means I'll have to find a way to get a hotel room with a waterpark, so the kids don't complain about said party.

:inhale. hold. exhale. [yes I'm doing that as I type] repeat.:
:find balance:

My grandparents are still in town, and I'm trying to divide my time between spending it with them, because I don't have much time until their drive back to New Mexico. I wish they would stay here, but I completely respect their decision to go home. Its home. Its been their home for the last 22 years. I can still dream...

I'm a little torn that Dylan has been spending so much time with his friends and not with me. I want to feel really good about it, because that means he has friends, however, he's not home very often and we don't get to do much together :whine- omg, don't I sound pathetic?: I realized tonight that it is not unusual for us to not have any children at home except for the baby lately. Alex has his friends, and between Sam and his grandparents, I hardly see him too.

I can't wait for school to start, because then I'll always know where my kids are [being the same place every day]. I know where they are; I am a good mom- cripes, I don't let the roam the neighborhood, but you know? I feel I could get so much more done with them at that special place, I know and love so much.

Okay I think I'm to the point of rambling, so if you've made it this far, congratulations! You've won the opportunity to gaze at my adorable son.

G'night, everyone.

LOVE

As much as I can, I'm visiting my Grammy while she is here. She & Grampa come north every 4 years or so, and while she is here, she's getting some of her medical issues looked at. We have better medical care here, than they do in New Mexico.


Gramma, me & Jackjack [he's trying to sabotage the camera, he's yanking on the cord.]


<3 So you think I'll look like her when I'm 83? Hope so... she's beautiful.

My African violets. I bought these 3 years ago, when I started working at the hellish call center... they had flowers when I purchased them, and this is the first time in 3 years they have bloomed.

jackjack loves his toes

Oh! And Jackjack is starting the cereal & formula combo... hopefully he'll be weaned by the end of August, so I can go back to work! :he drank a full 4 oz!!!:

Hopefully I'll be back to work by end of August, early September.

Its goo time!

Yes, goo. What is coming out of his mouth is the goo left over after he's "eaten" his first rice cereal. It looks like a cross between puke and formula. No chunks, just a bunch of drooled cereal.

He was all "eh, eww.. I dunno about this..."
But like a good little birdie, he opened up again...


Gramma was ecstatic to see him eat cereal for the first time.

Needless to say it went better the second time. I swear he ate, but I don't know how much actually ended up in his mouth.

Independence day

I realize this is a few days late, but we've been celebrating my eldest son's 13th birthday. He turned 13. The boy is a teenager. :exhales the deep breath I've been holding for 10 years:

Before I go any further: I love you Alex. Happy Birthday.



It came and went with no burns, no fingers lost, and plenty of fun & sunshine for all. I took some cool shots of the fire & some fireworks and sparklers.

Deadlines and Parenting

So I've started the baby Helmet that I've been asked to do. Because the object in question is such a critical piece [quite literally- this helmet reshapes the boy's head, so its round, not flat in multiple spots, as his parents told me], Fredward needs to and has offered to care for the kids so I could focus on my new project and not have to worry about making dinner or taking care of the boys this evening. Exception, being Jackjack, when he needs to be fed. Problem being, Jack screams when Fred is trying to care for him, either because he [Fredward] isn't me, or because Fred isn't standing up. The boy doesn't like to sit down - actually, he doesn't like it when you sit down. He wants to be up and moving and going. So I ended up taking Jack a few times throughout the evening when I just couldn't take the screaming anymore, because he wouldn't stop. No, its not colic, he is just unhappy with Fred in the evening hours. Usually because he doesn't take the greatest of naps during the day, so he is cranky as all hell by the time Fred gets home.

The other boys don't seem to notice Fred is in charge, either.

Alex came into the kitchen fully expecting me to start dinner after my guests left, and to his surprise, I took the helmet and went into the studio without another word. He looked completely puzzled as Fred explained that Mom has to work on a project that has to be done by tomorrow, and that he has to help me out tomorrow. Take care of Dylan and Jack- Mom will feed Jack, but you'll have to play with him.

:side note- this ought to be interesting:

Dylan comes up to me; "Ah, Mom?"
'What, Dylan?'
"I don't like brown beans."
'Tell someone who cares. Tell dad. I'm working at the moment.'
Dylan was present during the Authority change explanation. He also heard it earlier in the day. I have no idea if it registered or not though.

And Jackjack, of course, screamed and cried and carried on and on and on. Then I took him, attempted the calm-down ritual, fed him, and gave him back to Fred.

What? I've got work to do. This Helmet isn't going to paint itself.

Summer is official.

We've been at the beach, playing in the sprinkler, and hiding out in the air conditioning avoiding the fierce glare of the Midwestern intense heat/humidity combo. Jackjack had his first foray into the lake this weekend, swim diaper and all. The kid smelled like sunscreen for two days. I bathed him, I swear.

But he didn't burn, thank goodness. Through my sunglasses, I could have sworn he was a little pink, but that could have just been from being in the water.

Dylan, ever the daredevil when it comes to water, continues his quest to jump off the pier to see how far he can actually go.

This little guy has taught himself how to swim. It totally blows my mind, too. He can hold is breath and swim under water, he wears his goggles, and regularly challenges himself. I am so proud.

Between sleepovers and playtime at friends houses, its actually rare to get all three boys together lately. Never thought that would happen, but I'm grateful it has. It means my kids have friends, and are determined to keep those friendships.

But here they are. And I love them. Look how much they have all changed! My goodness! They are growing and changing on a daily basis. They are getting older, more mature. That doesn't mean I'll admit to getting older. I am, but I refuse to grow up.

Craving a sense of smell

I have a stuffy nose at the moment, but that's not why I crave a sense of smell. I just want to be able to breathe. Being cooped up in the air conditioning [yea, woe is me-pfft] kind of screws with the breathing processes. At least for me it does. Its like being held hostage in the winter by the savage cold, only to have the dry warm air do the same damn thing to you.


No, this post comes tonight on the thoughts, rather the acknowledgments of my sense of smell. I know I can smell, but to have an ability to stop and smell- you know, like the saying "stop & smell the roses." Stop for a second, and register the smells around you. I smell a dry dust and not much else at the moment. But earlier today, I smelled the sickly sweet smell of antifreeze after I had shut my car off. I smelled the rain that didn't come. I smelled the familiar stench of cow dung, after being caught behind what my dad refers to as the 'shit spreader'. I smelled the different chemicals the co-op down the road holds. Smelled like fertilizers when I passed the truck with the container full of liquid on the back. I smelled my baby's poopy pants, I smelled his hair. I smelled the aloe reacting with Dylan's sunburn. I smelled the oil when I came home tonight, from cooking catfish earlier for Fred's dinner. I smelled the clean clothes, and the fresh air from the towels I folded which hung outside on the line. I smelled the chocolate in the batter before I put the muffins into the oven. I smelled them when they were close to being finished. I smelled the cold fish as I put it away for Fred's lunch tomorrow.





I tell you all this to make you aware. I'm sure you already are, but next time you smell something, whether its good, bad or beyond foul, be present in your reaction. Don't act from the subconscious, act consciously.





One thing I didn't smell today:

my wonderful flowers the boys purchased for Mother's Day. They always smell so beautiful in the morning. Sticky-sweet sort of smell. If you don't believe me, get your nose right in there & inhale deeply. You'll see.

I love the Red Hot Chilli Peppers

So much. I remember hearing BloodSugarSexMagik and remember thinking what an awesome album it was. Is. Still is.



This was in the early years, when I was just, ah, "experimenting" with music. I was young enough to be living at home, and heavily influenced by my parent's choices. My dad's thing was the Oldies of the 50s & 60s, and had to be one of the only people I knew who didn't care for the Beatles. My mom liked John 'Cougar' Mellencamp, as he was known back then [she still does, I think]. Granted, BloodSugarSexMagik came out quite a few years later, but still. It was this raw, crazy sound to me, and I remember going to my cousin's house to play- she had the CD, and would let me crank it when I was over. I would listen to the entire album, over and over. I loved her for that. Still do.

I was fascinated, even back then, by all of their tattoos. The inside cover had photos of all of their tattoos... I would look at all the different designs, and try to match the tats with their owners. I love the pictures and how they looked as they were wrapped around various parts of their bodies. How yummy they looked covered in tattoos.


To this day, I love two things: Loud music and tattoos. Apparently, not much has changed. And I'm okay with this. I still think guys with tattoos are hot: see my husband for further proof. And I still listen to whole albums, over and over and over and over again. In a single song era, whole album appreciation is vital. Well, at least, for me it is.

Happy listening, folks.

June 21, 2003

I got married 6 years ago on this day. I married my Fred, the man who has consistently made me laugh for the last 10 years. He carried me through the rough times, and laughed at me during all the other times. We are raising 3 boys together and have decided that our family is complete. Our anniversary falls this year on Father's day. Happy Father's Day, Fredward.




He made me the most awesome gift- which I avoided sharing with you all on Friday night when he gave it to me. I have been having some trouble with my inspiration lately. He captured my inspiration and put it in a box, so that when I lose it, its always in a place where I can find it.



And I love him.

That was the dog.

That was you.
No! That was the dog! :grins:

-----earlier in the day------

We are driving to Target to pick up some sandals for the middle boy. [And hopefully for myself, if they are cheap enough. *fingers crossed*] We, for this trip, are: myself, Alex, Dylan & Jackjack. The variance in ages make it difficult to keep focused on a trip. We are not merely going shopping, we are going for a purpose. This is an excursion! I need to buy Dylan sandals for the summer. Otherwise he'll be running around in socks & shoes, as he refuses to go barefoot. This child, mind you, has a shoe problem. I daresay shoe fetish, because I am still wondering does a fetish develop in those early years?? To say he likes shoes is an understatement. This kid adores shoes. Somehow he wished and prayed with all his might to get his beloved Sketcher's shoes.

That boy ended up with three pairs of sketchers: Airators, Z-Straps, and Evaders. And a pair of Heeleys.

Alex wants to look at (key word: look, because I sure as hell ain't that dropping that kind of dough!) video games, and "Oh, there is a Best Buy over there, Mom, can we stop there too please!!!???!?!" Because when we get there, he wants to check out new cell phones, laptops and, of course, video games. Everything his, and mine, - admittedly- wishful thinking can afford.

Dylan is the one getting the shoes sandals so there is no avoiding that mission. However, there is Dylan, "Mom, check out these shoes!" and me: "No, Dylan we are shopping for sandals, not shoes right now. Oh.. wow, these are cool. Hey Dylan! Did you see these shoes? Aren't these super cool?!?!?"

Jackjack, had no agenda. Well, that he voiced anyways. I pointed out, the minuscule 'baby boys' section. It was the newborn wall with all of the slippers, bathrobes, onesies, that sort of thing. Gift-y stuff. One-third of the rack was boys, the rest was girls stuff!!!!! Any mother with a boy, knows exactly what I am talking about. The boys turned their heads to acknowledge my statement. Alex even returned to that subject when I finally dragged us past there on the way out.

So really its me, almost encouraging them, pausing to shop, look, and telling them "lets go!"

Boys: "But mom! Did you see that?!"
Me: :sighs: "Alright! :smiles: But make it quick, we've got to go!"



------------>back to now, with the whole farting-in-the-chair issue. Yes that was it. The dog was behind him- on the other side, really, but just behind him, and he's sitting in the recliner, settling into some Grand Theft Auto and rips one off. <------------- Among the many, many reasons I love my son, here are a few: Mom, did you see that? hrm?
Why are all those bikes there? What is that?
Its a bike path, there is a little cafe there.
They have a bike club? Awesome! I'm gonna make a foot club! No, a shoe club! For people who wear shoes!
:laughing:
A boat! Aw, Mom! Lets buy that boat!
:laughing: Oh, boy!
No Outlet. There is no outlet in that sign.
really?
Ooh, look at that. Tractor! Lets get a tractor. OOh, A patch of grass! Lets get a patch of grass.
:grins:
Oh, Look, A house!
[If you are wondering, it looked like a kit house- buy the halves & put it together type of deal.]

Wonder what Bob would say if we got that and put it in the back yard.
:his horrible imitation of Bob's voice- sounds like an old lady really: "Oh, no! Not my precious grass! Bah!"

-we commence driving through the swanky tourist-y town to get to target, because I didn't think to get on the freeway! Sitting at the stoplight-

Mom! Its the boat! We saw that guy! Lets buy the boat!
Aw, look mom! A horse! I want a horse like that!

[Horses are apparently part of the community's Public Art Project this year]


MOM!!!!!! OMG, LOOK! ITS A SNOWMOBILE! THEY ARE JUST THROWING IT OUT WITH THE TRASH, AW, CAN I BRING IT HOME?
oh, hell no. No, no, no no no no no no no no no no, no.

ooo, look! A rummage, aw, can we stop?!
:laughing:


-as we pass we can both clearly see that its all crap-

eh, maybe on the way back? [hoping to god, he doesn't remember. But judging from the incident in the store earlier, he'd remember. of course.]

MOM! ITS THE SNOWMOBILE!!! Can I bring it home? Lets put it in the trunk!
no.
But you guys never let me bring anything home to work on!
How are you going to work on it?
I've got tools! I have a huge toolbox at my grandparents! I'll bring it home. It weighs like 500 pounds when its empty!!


-by this point I'm laughing out loud and shaking my head, because he is laughing at himself, and smiling, trying in a miserable attempt to keep a straight face and a 'serious' attitude about it!

Bring on the teenage years, folks. Because this kid is hysterical. I promise I won't want to go back to the hundred-thousand-questions-a-day act around 5-7 years old, because I've got two more kids to go through that with. I love my boy.


Mom, can we turn this into a bowl? Like hollow it out, and its all hard and stuff, like a gourd?

I understand. I really do.

We all need a little love and affection these days. We really do. Sometimes though just when you want it, you don't. You want it when you can't have it, and can't have it when you want it. It is frustrating as all hell when your 3 1/2 month old has been 'put to bed' twice but can't be bothered with sleeping at this time of night! NOOOOO!!!! Its time to play! Its time to smile and charm the pants off your already weary and sex -deprived parents!!! aarrrgghh!!!

I swear if the kids weren't so fucking cute.....




.... well, even then I'd have a hard time. I love the little lump o' baby way too much.

Indy And The Jones

Is how my 5 1/2 year old refers to Indiana Jones. It was quite hysterical, because he really thought he was saying it correctly!

Also, my boy- as of today-, CAN RIDE HIS BIKE WITH NO TRAINING WHEELS!

ooh yes!

*for the record, he used to sing along to this song whenever he heard it on the radio. Or whenever he was riding his bike and then he would take his hands off the handlebars, singing 'I can ride my bike with no handlebars, I can ride my bike with no handle bars, no handle bars...'

'Twas awesome, let me tell you.

:background music- Flobots, Handlebars:

Handlebars
i can ride my bike with no handlebars
no handlebars
no handlebars

i can ride my bike with no handlebars
no handlebars
no handlebars

look at me, look at me
hands in the air like it's good to be
alive
and i'm a famous rapper
even when the paths're all crookedy
i can show you how to do-si-do
i can show you how to scratch a record
i can take apart the remote control
and i can almost put it back together
i can tie a knot in a cherry stem
i can tell you about leif ericson
i know all the words to "de colores"
and "i'm proud to be an american"
me and my friend saw a platypus
me and my friend made a comic book
and guess how long it took
i can do anything that i want cuz, look:

i can keep rhythm with no metronome
no metronome
no metronome

and i can see your face on the telephone
on the telephone
on the telephone

look at me
look at me
just called to say that it's good to be
alive
in such a small world
i'm all curled up with a book to read
i can make money open up a thrift store
i can make a living off a magazine
i can design an engine sixty four
miles to a gallon of gasoline
i can make new antibiotics
i can make computers survive aquatic conditions
i know how to run a business
[ Flobots Lyrics are found on www.songlyrics.com ]
i can make you wanna buy a product
movers shakers and producers
me and my friends understand the future
i see the strings that control the systems
i can do anything with no assistance
cuz i can lead a nation with a microphone
with a microphone
with a microphone
and i can split the atoms of a molecule
of a molecule
of a molecule

look at me
look at me
driving and i won't stop
and it feels so good to be
alive and on top
my reach is global
my tower secure
my cause is noble
my power is pure
i can hand out a million vaccinations
or let'em all die from exasperation
have'em all healed from their lacerations
have'em all killed by assassination
i can make anybody go to prison
just because i don't like'em and
i can do anything with no permission
i have it all under my command
because i can guide a missile by satellite
by satellite
by satellite
and i can hit a target through a telescope
through a telescope
through a telescope
and i can end the planet in a holocaust
in a holocaust
in a holocaust
in a holocaust
in a holocaust
in a holocaust

i can ride my bike with no handlebars
no handlebars
no handlebars

i can ride my bike with no handlebars
no handlebars
no handlebars

Getting rid of chipmunks 101

I can pour gasoline in its hole & start it on fire.
-wha-?
I could shoot it.
-yea, get your gun & go shoot that damn thing. It keeps eating my strawberries!
I can't shoot it, I don't have a scope on it anymore
--Use the iron sights on your gun!
My gun doesn't have the iron sites! You should let me use your pellet gun dad.
--I'm not letting you use my gun! You wouldn't even be able to hit the damn thing!
I'd try!
--The last time I let you use my pellet gun you didn't hit a damn thing! And you were shooting at everything!
Its not my fault that you actually hit the first bird you shot at!
--You need to practice more!

:[--]Fred and Alex proceed to tell me the story about the time Fred took Alex out to practice shooting Fred's pellet gun. Fred goes, 'Oh, look I'll shoot the bird.' and actually hits the bird. A flock flies by and Alex didn't hit a one. Then there is a dispute on when this actually happened- was it 2 years ago as Fred says, or was it when Alex says he was 6?:


No it was when I was in grade school.
--No, it was 2 years ago!
Well then I was 8!

:for the record, Alex is 12. He'll be 13 in July.:

-wha-?
I'll just go get my shot gun.
-wha?
--You can't go using a shot gun to kill a freaking chipmunk! You'll blast big holes in everything!
Noo, I'll just use birdshot. Wonder what Bob would say?
-wha-?
I could use a blowtorch.
-YOU ARE NOT USING A BLOWTORCH ON SOMETHING THAT IS WITHIN 6 FEET OF THIS HOUSE!!!!!


:For the record, no chipmunks were harmed during the course of this discussion.

But if those little fuckers keep eating my strawberries, they will be!:

Do you really need TWO eyebrows?

Alex: "Dylan, can I shave one of your eyebrows?"
Dylan: "NOOO!"



Well, as it turns out, no eyebrows were lost during the shaving of Dylan's head. Alex did, however, have an awesome time stopping at various points during the haircut telling Dylan he was "done". He experimented with stripes.....


.... and a teeny tiny little tuft of hair left behind, just to see if he'd notice.



He noticed.